For some unknown reason I have had a wild hair for about a week. Somewhere in my messed up mind, I needed to go roller-skating. I needed the lights, the wind in my hair, and of course... “Supersonic” at a deafening level. I even tried to coerce two different friends to go with me. Being the voices of reason that I so desperately need, they both said “NO.”
This was a disaster waiting to happen.
Now, Lindsey has been skating before, exactly-once. But, my little Anna Kate has never. She has never seen, or put on, the ugly, brown, four- wheeled, throw away your socks when you are finished and disinfect your feet skates. It was TIME for her to experience this right of childhood.
I started off VERY apprehensive about the whole thing. I had a girl who could barely stand, and another who got out of the car, and in the parking lot decided that she would just sit it out altogether.
Not exactly a good start.
After convincing Anna Kate to walk into the building, she found her some courage. I, on the other hand, swallowed hard. I stood there knowing this could be a grand childhood memory or a massive therapy bill one day.
To say the least, we learned some valuable lessons that afternoon:
Skates only work if you put them on.
It took a long while for Anna Kate to decide that she would skate. She watched, waited ,and she wondered about the sanity of all of this. You could read on her face the thoughts going through her little head . Why would we even try this when our two legs were just fine? I could see the struggle as she began thinking about riding a skateboard, playing a game,etc when she had to try something new and it was good. Remembering the difference between fine and fabulous.... and, in the end, she chose fabulous!
YOU make the skates work.
Lindsey put her skates on, then proceeded to start complaining. She insisted that they were faulty
and wanted new ones. She protested very loudly about how they wouldn't “go.” Now, keep in mind that she was just standing still during her relatively long tirade. She just stood there waiting for some magic to happen. I told her “There is no ON switch on skates my dear, you must move your feet in order for this to work.” Eureka! She started moving her feet and to her surprise, skating.
Instructions are no fun , but necessary.
The rink guard saw my girls skating and had a few things to say to them. He was a nice man who had some suggestions for them. AK looked at him and said “ I am doing good. I don't need you.” he smiled and said.... “Sweetheart, listen to me, I have done this a while and if someone is trying to help you , pay attention. They might make it a whole lot easier on you." - good advice
Everyone starts off slowly.
I finally lured Anna Kate onto the rink. She was holding onto me for dear life. I had to gently explain to her that she would never ever skate until she learned to let go of me. She kept her eyes on me, or the skates, for our first few laps around the circle. Then it happened. She saw the other skaters and got just plain mad. She yelled at me to “Let go, she could do it. She didn't need me, or my help.” She wanted to go fast like everybody else. Much to her disappointment, that was not a very sound decision with her level of skill. She, of course fell, and fell, and fell. In her enthusiasm, to be something she wasn't, she skipped the basics,and all that left her was frustrated.
You can't go to the bathroom, on wheels, without lots of practice.
The inevitable happened. Someone always has to go to the bathroom. I knew that if the carpet was
difficult, and the rink even harder, then peeing on wheels could result into an epic nightmare. I wouldn't let her even try. I made her sit down and completely take off the
skates, put back on her shoes, and then go. It was a simple,everyday task, but throw in a new variable.... and everything changes. Sometimes wisdom, and experience must win out. This was a
“ Because I am the mother” moment. She didn't need all the details, just an obedient heart would save her a lot of pain and embarrassment.
Distraction can also make it dangerous.
We finally arrived at some stability. Both girls were up, and moving on their own when crowd began to grow. What was once a dimly lit room, morphed into a thirteen year old's dream; the strobe lights, loud music, and the floor flooding with preteens. Everything began to change. Getting caught up in the distractions started to interfere with their attention and skill. The lights and music and people were exciting, but somewhat unsafe on their skill level.
Everyone falls down, skaters get back up
I looked up once and saw Lindsey on the ground. I went to her, but she just laid there. I dried her
tears, and tried to pull her back up. I couldn't. I had to coach her, but she had to do it. I told her to get up..... and she said “No.” she was done and she was just going to stay there. I told her that this was
a skating rink ,not a sitting rink …. “skaters skate, now get up.” She finally decided that sitting there wasn't going to accomplish anything so she picked herself up and started again.
Sometimes it takes a while to get your balance
I had a hard time at first getting MY feet back under me. It honestly took a few times around the circle
before my body remembered what to do. I couldn't even begin to help,or encourage, much less teach, until I could do it without assistance.
Beginning anything, with falling as your goal, is never going to be a good plan.
The DJ decided to play a game. Wipeout! Poor Lindsey is always the joiner. She will try anything
without fear. I warned her, but she was determined. Not knowing the rules, or even watching just once, she jumped right in. She realized all too quickly, this game hurts.
Being a mom and Skating have more similarities than you think.
As I think back, I can see it. My job as a mother, and every stage,was represented on the rink that afternoon. My babies started off needing me on so many levels, Not even taking a step without my
help. Then, little by little, they learned to stand for themselves. With instruction, and practice, they began to let go. They ran into some difficult situations. Some I could coach them through, and some
I just had to let them figure out on their own.
Now, my girls are very young still, and we have a lifetime of lessons to endure. But it occurred to me as I removed this “too-old-to-roller-skate-body” off the rink, that they were in the middle of the floor dancing, singing and smiling. They were loving every minute of it. Doing what we came to do.
Without me.....
I pray that one day their life will be like that. One day they will find themselves in the midst of the noise of life. One day they will be ready let go.
Right now is...... the hard part. The painful, back- breaking instructions, the trying, falling, and getting back up part.
But....
All this work will be for that moment.... the moment when I get to see them, confident, self- assured, and in love with the moments that God will give them. Enjoying their adventure, while fulfilling God's plan for their life.
and I can't wait for that moment---- (Jam-on-it!)
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